Celtic Banter Archive May 31 2012

31 May 2012 20:12:47
ed how could they prove that we wer doctoring the turnstiles after all this time , and why investigate us now , {Ed007's Note - What?}

A Tardis is the way to go.

K-Dot.

Wow,angry bears running out of straws to clutch at!!

I don't know what the op is talking about but i'll guess it's that old chessnut, celtic were not declaring all monies that came through the gates in the 60's 70's . would'nt worry about it mate it's only them trying to drag everybody else down to their level . yes the gates were bigger than celtic ever declared but what they're not telling you is every other man lifted a wee boy over the turnstyles so yes bigger crowds but celtic never got a penny out of it . the only winners were the wee boys who watched one of the best teams ever to play football for nothing , i know i was that wee boy . so relax the bears have nothing ..bb {Ed007's Note - Also clergymen, bus drivers in uniform from the old SMT and 'Corpy' amongst others were allowed in for free for years, it's a nonsense and just shows the levels of desperation some Rangers fans have reached looking to drag others into their mess. Does anyone actually think that Rangers accounts from then would have been squeaky clean, they can't hand in accounts in this day and age never mind what went on in those days of players and bills being paid in cash.}

31 May 2012 19:10:37
Rangers have provided the Scottish Premier League with documentation that will allow them to continue with their investigation into alleged undisclosed payments to players.

The SPL board instigated the investigation on 5th March following claims surrounding the club's use of Employment Benefit Trusts (EBTs) during Sir David Murray's reign.

The SPL last week stated that they were looking forward to receiving 'full co-operation' from Rangersand the club's administrators after failing to receive the necessary documents.

That lengthy investigation moved a step closer to completion on Thursday when the SPL released a statement which read: "The SPL confirmed that Rangers FC had today provided documentation to the SPL in relation to the SPL's investigation into EBT payments.

"The SPL's legal team will now review and provide an update to the SPL Board at the next SPL Board meeting on June 18."
a spokesmin sade" we kin cunfurm thit the team thit used tae be cauld ranjurs HUV gave us the 3 wee bits a papur thit we hid demandit tae see befour xmas if it wiz awrite wae thaem in they wurnae too bizzy,
aw wull noo opun the unvelopes in nae purtikulur oardur,we asked the kwestyin " who made ranjurs lie in thur ain pish"?
an the nominashuns ur....
envelpoe wan,(rustle rustle rustle)
the ansur is "wee craigo!" ( fur hiz role in " the wurst fkn pound ah evur spent!",
envelpoe b, "big minty"(fur his role in " ah wiz duped"(
n lastly
envelpoe 3, (rustle rustle big pause)
" ah big boy did it n ran tae fk "( fur hiz role n sossidge)
so thats it lady n gentlemen an incunclusive verdicked so we HUV tae droap the chergis against the club nooo nown iz ranjurs the champs 2013 n wull be findin oot waeays tae help thum bak oan thur feet hithurtoo tae,oor legal teem duff n duffur wull look it waeys tae compinsate the teddies fur aw the angwish thit we huv pit thum thru god bless thum tae "
"aw staun fur the queen..........
ahm sory the queen canae be wae us this efturnin, bit sends hur best wishes thru hur medium,( sized drawurs)
" god bless oor grashus kween ,
weev owed hur dough thats mean,
worse scrounjurs thit shes seen,
god bless oor kween,

Send hur tae "Victorias",
shed like tae bury us,
who kin blame ur wur like some PUSS, god help oor kween!"

anybidy fancy ah pint?

31 May 2012 16:35:58
ED007, I see that Rankers have finally sent documents to SFA, the 3 month
delay was caused by getting said documents back from "Shred-It"..
Mr Reagan has asked for all jigsaw lovers within SFA to help him "piece"
together the evidence... LOL Timalloy {Ed007's Note - *groan*

Timbo wers ma wumin/cmoan we spat oan wur hauns n hud a big man hug ( well a limp hug fae you bit jist eftur we spat n hid a hug a wiped ma spit oan yur jaickit) bit thats a legully bindin spit in the mince pies ae the law correkt ed,
mind ah dun it wae you n moniepinnie? still waitin fur big moniepinny tae come acrose? {Ed007's Note - She's still waiting on proof from your doctor that you are disease free, a note from Vera doesn't count.}

Pat, please furnish me with your address, sorry but any "big hoose" does not count, I will then send Mrs T over in her horsebox, er range rover to you. Please be aware she is used to the finer things in life, I hope you will keep her in the style she always told me she was used to, Timalloy
PS once delivered there is NO RETURN POLICY .......

Dizees fkn diseez ahl huv the baith ae yiz no thit evury tues wen a sine oan ahm sprayed wae dettol fae tap tae toe, n wen ah huv tae make the grand jestyur ae pittin ma name oan the dottit line the wee guy aeawaeys says tae me " mr ***************" its nice tae no ye make an effurt, ye aeways make me boak, ( his names justin) here ye wid uv thote nuthin cood make THAT boak? n tae proov it I huv sent a cooriur owur tae yur hoose ( nae cherge) wae a sperm sampul wae the instrukshins thit if yur no in tae leev it wae the wumin nixt door, noo wen ye opun the parsul , throw the sperm aganst the wa, if it stiks ( witch it aewaeys diz itz dizeez free,if no then yase it tae stick walpapur up wae, its stroangur thin SOLVITE") unlike yoors ya wee toerag wen yoors wiz threw aff the wa ye knoaked doon ma partishun in the oan sweet,ya bam,
remembur nae wumin nae cry,iz boab n hiz wailurs sung,
asap, get that wumin acrose pronto ur yur vasektimys oan its waey cumprendo?

Furnish ye ? ahl furnish ye! here its no sum fkn wurk ae ert here its jist the equiv ae a cotstaun fae "ikeya",plus its flat pack! plus thurs aewaeys bits left........

31 May 2012 15:39:39
here ed ur the sellik stull talkin tae lee evans big bro forstur,if so whits happenin cos he mite jist "take aff" wae they big lugs ae hiz sooth fur the summur?
get bak tae me asap ur yur widden crutchiz ur gettin WD40'd rite
ps if ranjurs end up deed where wid we bury thum?
discuss class {Ed007's Note - The contract is still sitting waiting on Forster signing it.}

Ere ed is that pat? and yer qestune aboot wer ranjurs get birried well the eers that that c**t goat (evens) they could fly ere ipox and splatter the ashes ere there and if they birried them it wood be somewer green,lol, stef1967

Pat, if Rankers died one would imagine a burial in the North Sea would be appropriate, with 100,000 bears in attendance, it could be the "watershed" moment we all want... LOL Timalloy {Ed007's Note - Get their remains over to just outside Galway, there are plenty of low lying fields to choose from :-)

Whits the maetur wae hum kin he no fkn rite?
ahm fonin his auld da lee evuns

Wit aboot the clyde thats green ur wee craigos teeth green ,
eds ankle -green,
the bak ae timbos jaickit-green

31 May 2012 12:29:35
Its possible that superinjunctions could have been used by certain leg-ends for protection... thats the hot rumour regarding missing names...

30 May 2012 23:55:29
Can anyone point me in the right direction for the Orc with a rangers tattoo image? Cheers joe

{Ed007's Note - This one?

www.celticrumours.co.uk/ar_366.php